Over the weekend I went on a retreat with my church. The focus of the retreat was "Renewing You," which was apparently perfect because one of my coworkers said, before the retreat, that she hoped I would come back renewed, and my supervisor asked this morning whether I felt renewed from the retreat. Both were surprised and amused when I then told them the them of the retreat.
It was great to get out of my usual routine, and I was able to put away my fears about my family's reaction to my transition, as well as worries about how it will affect my work. I roomed with the other guys (all two of them) and spent the weekend feeling normal and accepted and affirmed.
I did come back feeling renewed. I gained some insights from the messages and the small group discussions, and feel more hopeful about improving my relationship with God. Change doesn't tend to happen all at once, but it definitely helps to believe change is possible.
I'm back in the "real world" with work demands, as well as all the uncertainty about the ramifications of my transition. But I feel secure that God will be with me through this, and that I have supportive people in my life who will also be there for me.
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